A Small Moment, A Big Impact

Recently, I was reflecting on how we spent last year’s New Year’s Eve. {Get ready, guys, because this time of year always makes me super nostalgic.} It was about 3 weeks after our failed IVF and other failed fertility treatments throughout the year, right after Christmas, which was admittedly hard last year and truthfully, I wasn’t sure I was actually in the mood to celebrate the holiday at all.

But, I got dressed up and we went out with some of our very favorite people. It was actually pretty great. A roaring 20’s theme with just the right amount of people and we all had seats {once you’re past college age, it’s important to have seats at the bar, ha!}. I remember the great decor, the 20s dances we all learned together, the dinner before hand, the champagne {which was a real treat considering I hadn’t been able to drink during or before IVF!}, but that’s not really what I ended up taking away from the whole night.

The clock struck midnight and we were all out on the dance floor celebrating. Auld Lang Syne was playing in the background and balloons dropped – the whole picturesque scene was sort of right out of a movie, but what I really remembered was the look one of my best friends gave me right before he hugged me. Maybe I had too much champagne at that point, but I was feeling slightly emotional knowing we were entering a new year. A new year that would be full of ups and downs, for both of us, that we weren’t yet even aware of. I was scared. I was scared of how things would turn out, but I didn’t want to say it. And I think he knew. Because the look he gave me said, “No matter what happens, it’s going to be okay. I’ve got your back. You can do this.” It was exactly what I needed. No words. Just a look and a hug that said, “I’m here.”

I just had this huge sense of relief. The night went on, we all had a blast and as the big group of us headed back to our hotel rooms, my friend and I stopped at the top of the escalator because we saw another party in one of their conference rooms. Looked like a wedding. So, we crashed it. We danced like freaking idiots on their dance floor and then ran out like fools laughing. I can’t remember the last time I laughed that hard in a while.

I don’t think I’ve ever told him this story to be honest. I don’t think I’ve told anyone. I don’t think he even knows what kind of impact those two moments had on me that night because they were small moments. But they helped me enter 2016 with some renewed hope. I knew that no matter what, we had some pretty great friends who had our backs through the good and the bad.

It’s absolutely true when they say sometimes it’s not what you say, but what you do. I didn’t need to really be told anything that night. A hug and a few crazy dances at a crashed wedding were it. If you have a friend or family member who is going through something similar, it’s not always about what you say. Because it’s hard to say the right things sometimes.

So give your friend a silent hug. Crash a wedding with them. Whatever it is, let them know you have their back. You have no idea the impact it might have on them.

And to my friend, thank you.

 

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